Dec. 5: Steppin’ Out
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Before I forget — keep an eye out for Mike and me on the VH1 special “Best Week Ever” airing Dec. 14th. I can’t tell you what we’re doing, but I will tell you it’s going to be funny. That’s one of the best shows on television, right behind How I Met Your Mother and Aliens in America. Have you guys heard of that last one? It’s on the CW network — Mondays at 8:30 p.m. ET. It’s about a family in the Midwest who have a beautiful, popular high school aged daughter…and a dorky high school aged son.
In an effort to try and boost her son’s popularity, the mom comes up with the idea of hosting a male foreign exchange student for the year. All the posters show these tall, blonde Nordic studs. Mom figures her son will gain popularity just by standing next to the Nordic stud.
But… (remember, this show is joyfully politically incorrect, which I LOVE)…when the exchange student arrives, it’s not a Nordic stud at all. It’s a Muslim boy, robes and all. But it’s actually Raja (I have no idea if I’m spelling that name right and I’m too lazy to Google it right now) who ends up winning the family’s heart and teaching them all life lessons.
In a politically incorrect way, naturally.
I don’t know what it is with our show lately, but the green room has been a madhouse. Today we had a couple of very cute, very cranky toddlers; Gloria Gaynor rehearsing for a segment we’re going to air on Christmas; and three of Mike’s personal favorite frequent contributors. Yes, today was like Christmas for Mike with nutritionist Tanya Zuckerbrot (tall and skinny, like Mike likes them)…Imogen Lloyd Webber (blond and skinny, like Mike likes them) and Sanyika Calloway Boyce (tall and African American and skinny, like Mike likes them). He pretty much likes any kind of woman, come to think of it, but as he’s said before “like a bag of rakes” is a personal preference. Charming, isn’t it?
I used to have a “type”: TALL. Because I was always tall growing up (in 6th grade, my classmates at FC Martin called me “Lurch”) I think I felt like I needed to date someone big and tall to feel dainty and feminine. Most of my boyfriends over the years have been over 6’3” and blonde. Now I’m dating someone 5’11” and bald! And he is sexy, baby! I just wear flats a lot more now!
Here’s the thing about this show — we like to entertain, but we also know it’s crucial to give INFORMATION while we’re entertaining. That’s what separates us from other shows in the morning. One of the many lessons I’ve certainly had drilled into my head since doing this show concerns finances: LOOK AT YOUR BANK STATEMENTS! So many people just let them stack up; when in reality we should be monitoring them for strange charges. I just caught a restaurant that charged me twice for the same meal. It was a mistake but it was an expensive one, had I not spotted it. I never used to look at my monthly statement, I have to be honest.
I’m getting so anal now, that I’m actually going online to my account and looking at it every day. If you’re at a computer, and most of us are, just do it. It takes two seconds.
I also, as I said on the show today, never open the mail that doesn’t look like it’s a bill. Ok, I’ve learned my lesson on that one. There’s no excuse for putting our head in the sand, as my dad says I often do.
I’m trying to think about anything that went on behind the scenes today… oooh, an email just popped up on screen from Doug’s mom. Please hold.
Holding…
She’s just inquiring about her sick son who now has what I’ve had for a week. Hmmm, I wonder how that happened? Can I just say something, and I pray he does not read this because clearly, I’m talking about him… Have you ever noticed that men, when they get sick, put on the “sick voice” It’s really soft, and shaky, and like there’s no diaphragm sound to it. It’s all weak and sad? Haha. I mean, it’s not funny that he’s sick but it’s kind of funny to hear him play it up when he IS. I know you’re sick, sweetheart. You don’t have to sound like you’re dying… I get it.
He’s going to kill me.
On that note, I also want you folks who live in the New York and New Jersey region to keep an eye out for “Steppin’ Out” magazine. I just did an interview with a great celebrity journalist named Chaunce Hayden. He’s interviewed me before and I love his style. The interview will be coming out on Dec. 25th’s edition, and I discuss everything from Mike’s big secret (and I mean BIG) to what I regret about my life. Juicy, man.
I’d also like to interview YOU, sort of. If you have any great ideas or stories, please send them to me here at the website. Keep it short and clear, please. What would you like to see more of? Hear more of? What did you not like? Is there something that you think would make a great topic for our show? We really want to hear what you have to say…
